Silver's heart will shine on

Today marks Silver's one year anniversary since her passing.  The week has been hard leading up to today, but today I feel released and at peace.  I think about her every day and see so many of her qualities in her kids that shine through even more since they lost their mother, Silver.  In return, I see more of Silver every day.  Things I couldn't see before as strongly as I can now.  Mostly her giant, gentle heart.  She was such a beautiful mother to her kids and to me.  Those nurturing qualities have been passed on to her kids, in different ways and forms.  Silver's heart will shine on.

A poem I wrote shortly after Silver died, that speaks true today:

In the depths of blackness
I have wondered if I could ever love again
Another dog
Not knowing how to love the ones
I have
It was like the love just
drained from me
into the dirt
and I didn't know if I
could feel again
How could this human
bear that pain again
It doesn't seem possible
As someone once said to me
Intensely we love
Intensely we grieve
And it feels like my heart
can not bear
anymore
Not one more ounce of the loss
until I wake from my death coma
to know Silver's love is still
there
in every ounce of blood
coursing with love
Four puppies who lost
their mother
and I am renewed
I am not alone